Keep your head up ~  / Michelle Walesch-Munn
My heart just aches for you . . . I cant even imagine. I am so so so sorry you had to go thru such pain ! Stay strong ~ Close

Thinking of you.  / Katherine Rodger

I just wanted to say how sorry I am for the loss of your beautiful little boy!! He's beautiful....

I am also on the NILMDTS forum, and came across one of your posts, and saw that your sweet Anthony and my Isabelle both became angels on June 3rd, my Isabelle went to heaven June 3rd of 2008, due to a cord accident as well.

I just wanted to say hello and say i'm thinking of you and your family and your sweet baby boy!! I will say alittle prayer for him as well when I light Isabelle's candle! 

Sincerly Katherine

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Thanks for sharing your page  / Cely (none)
Hello and thank you for sharing your experience. I had no idea beautiful websites existed of precious little angels. I wanted to know what the Now I lay Me Down to Sleep Foundation was about and after reading Maddux's letter from his mommy I was heartbroken. These are things that really don't even cross our minds but it exists. I wish your family the best and may little Anthony always watch over all of you from above.

Cely Close

A Note to My Angel  / Anthony Simmons (Father)

Dear Anthony Jr.

This is your father speaking and I want you to know I love you and I remember you and I hope you know that also I know you have been watching over me and your mom and I am glad you do especially the way you protect her and I hope you know that all your siblings love and miss you too. I will always keep you in my heart and keep your memory alive with your mom leading the way we will always be there I hope that you know that I dream about you and the day we meet and i miss you so much I might be tough but I do wish you were alive and here but I hope you like the birthday your mom did for you today and I hope you got the balloons we all sent you so kisses and hugs to you my son, my angel, and a large piece of my soul love you forever bye fro now

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He is a beautiful angel!!  / Cindy Johnson (None)

Hello Anthony's Family,

I am so sorry for your loss.  I can truly relate to what you are going through everyday.  We lost our second grandson Nathan Johnson on Oct. 27th of 2006.  We were so elated with his arrival only 2 days to go the excitement of having another boy to spoil.  His big brother is 4 years old.  I still today do not understand what happen and ask myself why us??  But I am sure that god's blue print was much bigger and beautiful that he needed these angels to continue blessing this world. Things were great we had just been to a check up the day before he was doing great heartbeat was strong, and movement he was going to be a football player.  The following day we had to see the doctor again for blood work and while there he decided to listen for the heartbeat and could not find one.  We all thought that the equipment had malfunctioned but all of them were tried and nothing.  The sonogram was still no movement.  That day I play in my head everyday even today, the heartwrenching cries of my daughter-in-law and son I will never forget that day.  The world stopped and a piece of my me died that day with him.  He was delivered into this world that evening by c-section.  When I got to see him I begged and cried as you for him to open his eyes.  He was so perfect round chubby cheeks, black curly hair, beautiful red lips and soft smooth skin.  It was just like he was sleeping in our arms.  I too remember his smell and still today can smell on the blanket I bought him.  It has changed our lives in more ways than one and there were times that I just wanted to crawl up and die.  The day was like a merry go round I didn't know where to start but I knew that arrangements had to be made and it took all that I had in me to keep it together for my family especially my son.  I didn't know what to say or do for them they cried so hard.  The hardest thing was leaving the hospital and knowing we were coming home empty handed.  His room was ready and now it would be empty.  That tore my heart to shreads.  I will tell you this I was blessed to have been there through the whole pregnancy with them to listen to his heart beat, feel his kicks when I would talk to his mommy belly and there to see him through the end of his journey.  I held him that last day that we were to come home.  I waited with him in an empty room held him in my arms and rocked him in a chair.  I told him stories of his big brother sang to him and cried with all my might.  I didn't want to let him go when the funeral director came to pick him up.  They were so gentle with him carried him out in a carseat covered up with a beautiful blue blankie.  Ironic that before they took him from me I looked down at him and told him I hope that you can feel my heartbeat and my warm kisses on you right now.  I wished that he could show me a sign that he knew I was there and loved by many.  When I looked down at his beautiful round face, there was a small tear on the corner of his eye that rolled down.  I say today that was my sign.  Don't let people tell you as they did us that we need to move on and live that we should be lucky that we have his big brother that god had his reasons.  People don't and cannot understand unless they have walked in our shoes.  It does not get easier with time that first year is the hardest because you wonder of what all he would be doing his smiles, chuckles, kisses and hugs.  We celebrated his first birthday this past October with a celebration of a balloon release at the Cemetary and prayer.  That day was extremely hard for all of us.  But we got thorugh it and somehow found peace on that day knowing he was okay.  I cannot explain that feeling to you.  But there isn't a day that goes by we don't think of him or talk about him.  I hate when people tell my why do you talk about him that would make me sad, but you know like you said he was still born into this world he was and is a part of our lives till the day we die. Every holiday or just because we buy him flowers, toys and take them out to the cemetary and we often here others say I don't think that's healthy he's gone your just inflicting more pain on yourselves.  They don't understand and never will till it happens to them.  I don't wish that kind of pain on anyone.  I hope that our angels have met somehow and are enjoying the beautiful life god has stored for them.  You and yours are in my prayers.  Keep the faith and stay strong.  Thank you for allowing me to share my story with you.  I am sorry it was so long but these babies were born and shall never be forgotten.  God bless you.  www.nathanjohnson.memory-of.com is his website too.

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Happy St. Patricks Day  / Kelly~Journey's Mommy
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7 Months in Heaven..  / Kelly~Journey's Mommy
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Happy 7 months.  / Lyssa Paytons Mommy (A dear friend )
I know today is a sad day for your mom. She misses you so much. Are you and Payton having fun playing in heaven? I just wanted to be able to tell you that you have touched so many hearts and lives even though you never took a breath on this earth. You helped give me a great friend. You brought me to her and I thank you for that Anthony. I know you are so proud of your mommy there isnt anything not to be proud of. She is so kind hearted and knows how to make you smile. I know you shine down on her but today stay close and hold your mommy tight since I am to far away to be there to do that. Give her tons of hugs and kisses. Give her one of each from me as well. I hope they are givin you a big celebration in heaven. Sending you hugs and kisses to heaven sweet boy. Lots of loves Lyssa Close

Merry Christmas from Heaven  / Kelly~ Journey's Mommy
Merry Christmas from Heaven

I still hear the songs
I still see the lights
I still feel your love
on cold wintery nights

I still share your hopes
and all your cares
Ill even remind you to please
say your prayers

I just want to tell you
you still make me proud
You stand head and shoulders
above all the crowd

Keep trying each moment
to stay in his grace
I came here before you
to help set your place

You dont have to be
perfect all the time
He forgives you the slip
If you continue
to climb

To my family and friends
please be thankful today
Im still close beside you
In a new special way

I love you all dearly
now dont shed a tear
Cause im spending my christmas
with Jesus this year. Close

6 months  / It's Your Mama Sending Love 2. U!
Six months ago, right now...your lifeless body lay in my arms...forever sleeping, my forever baby! I remember how soft your skin was....and oooooh, it smelled so nice...if I close my eyes, and think real hard, I can still smell you on your blankie! I hope I will remember that smell forever! I remember quietly whispering to you...just wake up, open your eyes....let mommy see those beautiful eyes...let me hear your cry....oh how I begged and pleaded with you and with God.....WHY??? Yes, I still ask! I am missing you...WE are all missing you, here on earth...but I do feel you with me...do you feel me???? I sure hope so! I love you soooo much, Anthony! Happy 6 month birthday....wish this was all different......muah....xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Close

Happy 6 month Heavenly Birthday  / Jennifer Brown (Friend of Mommy's )

Anthony.... I just wanted to stop by and share with your Mommy and family how much you have meant to me. I have read your story that your Mommy wrote with such love and just have to say I'm so thankful for YOU... without YOU your Mom and I would have never met or known anything about each other. Your Mom is such a sweet lady and I know you watch over her. Watch over her today and give her an extra brush from your Angel wings to help her sad heart. I know she misses you terribly.
Kisses up to Heaven for you!

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6 months in heaven  / Kathy Schneider
Six months...feels like an eternity....feels like only yesterday.  I with be thinking of you and your family on this special day.  Estrella, I hope your holidays will be filled with the love of your friends and family in this difficult time. Close

May God grant peace in your soul  / Amber Dormanen (Estrella's old friend )
Estrella and family,

I wish you peace over the holiday season and that God will be there to mend your broken hearts every step of your journey.  We don't know why things happen the way they do, but trust in God because he has a plan.  Anthony, you were a blessing to your mom and dad sent here as an angel who could not stay.  You will be forever loved and forever in your mama's heart.  I know you were too special for this earth, but we can't help but be selfish because we wish you were here.  Make sure you find a way to show your mommy she will be okay and that you are there every step of the way, looking down and guiding her from heaven.

Happy Thanksgiving and much love to you and the fam and baby Ant! Close

It's your sis'er's 9th bday...  / It's Your Mama Sweet Angel (xoxoxoxox)
and she is missing you lots...shine down your love and do your best to make her birthday wishes come true. She deserves them!! We love you soo much lil' Ant, and we wish you were here to celebrate with us...but as big sis'er Des says..."he is here with us!" I am so happy that she can say that!! Come to us on our dreams so we can play with you and hold you close......lots of love baby boy....hugs & kisses, too...... Close

I can hardly believe...  / Lil' Ant's Mama
It's been 5 months since I held you in my arms...I miss you so bad. I wish I could hold you and kiss you and love you over and over again. Can you feel my love? I send it to Heaven for you, every minute of everyday. I wonder what you would be like?? Smiling, laughing, giving us your gummie kisses............oh how I wish I knew. I love you so much baby boy...the Holidays are coming and it is not going to be easy without you....please stay close and bring us all lots of Angel kisses! Mommy bought you your "Baby's first Christmas" ornament today, I hope you like it! Your sis'er Des really did! She misses you, too....she wishes she could know you. Please shine down your love on her and let her know that she WILL know you someday...and she WILL hold you in her arms in Heaven....one sweet day! I hope you are having a wonderful time in Heaven, I can only imagine what it must be like:) I love you Anthony Jr.!!!! Never forget how much you are loved and missed...........good night, sleep tight, don't let the love bugs bite.....only the LOVE bugs! <3 xoxoxoxoxxxxxxxxxxx


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Happy 5 months in heaven angel boy  / Heather Brown (friend of your mom on myspace )
Anthony, I just saw the whole page your mom did for you and i am just in tears!! Your mom did such  a great job and it is so beautfull!! I hope you have made alot of angle friends and your mom misses you so much!!! give my angel michael a hug from me and his dad and tell him he will never be forgotten and we love hom so much!
 happy 5 months heavenly birthday angel boy!! Close

I just wanted to say...  / Samantha From Lovely Things R. Us (friend of mother )
That your little angel is beautiful.  This page is a wonderful tribute to him. You have done a wonderful job with it. It is beautiful and so was he. I lost 2 of my own babies nowhere near as far along so I do not know exactly how you feel but I do want you to know that you and your angel is in my thoughts and you will be in my prayers. I know each day is hard to get through and I am truly sorry for your loss. If you ever need anything just to talk or whatever please don't hesitate to ask me.
Hugs from one angel mom to another!
Samantha Close

all my heart  / Mommy Loves You!
My sweet little Ant, I hope you know how much I love you and miss you. Mommy's heart is breaking everyday without you. I'm sorry you have to see me this way...please know that it is not you that makes me sad. Please shine down all that great love, mommy needs your help....I love you baby boy, please stay close! Close

thinking of u always little man  / Jeda-mummy 2. Angel Kayla (mummys friend )

HOPE UR HAVING FUN WITH MY KAYLA

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3 months  / Mommy Loves YOU!
Wow, it took me a whole week to take that one in...
3 months...you would have been so big, smiling, laughing, I am missing so many things that should have been. Also thankful for all I had and do have.  Sorry, no poems this month...At a loss for words...I love you baby boy, you know that! I hope you are dancing one for me on top of the clouds! Holding hands with Jarell and all your Angel buddies! Surrounded by love! Shine down Moonshine! Mommy will be looking for you in my dreams! xoxoxoxo
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